joe_s_magpies
New member
MICHAEL Ennis keeps the banner propped up in a corner of his garage.
Loves the sentiment, he says. The wit. Proud that a punter and his paintbrush would beat every Sydney league hack to scribbling that phrase Ennis The Menace.
"He was a Dragons fan too," the Bulldogs hooker recalls, smiling. "Approached me after a game two years back and handed the banner over. Said maybe I'd like it as a souvenir, hang it up at home.
"And why not … I mean, you've gotta have a laugh, don't you?"
Sadly Mick, it seems the answer is "no".
No, we can't laugh at your menacing ways. At your sledging. How dare you ask an ornament of the game like Nathan Hindmarsh if he wants to throw 'em?
It's why since that altercation with the Eels skipper a fortnight ago, you've been headhunted by the NRL, hounded by naysayers and had Sterlo suggest your missus should feel peeved.
Even Rabbitohs great Johnny Sattler, a man who boasts fewer skeletons than a crematorium come knock-off time, got stuck in.
And why?
Apparently because you had the nerve to physically challenge a footballer who - according to the NRL media guide - stands 7cm taller, weighs 10kg heavier and boasts 150 more games.
You said nothing about the Hindy clan, as was whispered in the hours and days afterwards. No smartarse remarks about those Telstra commercials, either.
No, instead you simply uttered: "You've been wanting to have a crack for years Hindy ... so if you wanna throw one, throw one."
Honestly, we've heard worse from a Presbyterian pulpit. Yet still you were sin-binned. Ridiculous.
Even worse when the NRL phoned Hindy next day to determine if what you'd said was a punishable offence - even though, by its own admission, it had no idea if a ruling existed to punish you.
So, no Mick, it seems there will be no more fun in rugby league.
Not now when our game has become so sanitised. So strung out on its own importance, The Daily Telegraph can get into an Atlanta Braves dressingroom before games but not South Sydney's afterwards.
League is a game where grown men earn $300,000, bench press 180kg and collide at forces greater than a NASA shuttle launch. So how can its fabric be so seriously threatened by a fella who couldn't talk when we first called yesterday because "my wife's out so I'm babysitting our three kids"?
So overplayed has the hype surrounding Ennis become, there's even been suggestions his banter has Blues coach Ricky Stuart ready to cut him adrift.
Ricky Stuart, really? The same R. Stuart who - according to every footballer from Ah Kuoi to Zisti - is the greatest sledger league ever produced? A rambunctious Raider who on one sunny Seiffert Oval afternoon got stuck into a rival trainer for wearing prescription sunnies onto the field.
A halfback who in his prime would've made Ennis sound like a member of the Von Trapp clan singing Edelweiss.
Which isn't to say this should become another Why We Must All Love Mick yarn. Even his wife is sick of those.
Besides, if you haven't yet realised Charlie Sheen ain't the only fella who transforms when confronted by a white line, well, another round of Good Guy plugs for men like Ennis, Paul Gallen and Greg Bird won't change you.
But if NSW really wanna save themselves from getting, as Roosters coach Brian Smith might phrase it, "bent over" by Queensland this year, they should use Ennis at nine, make Gallen skipper and run Bird freely from the bench.
Even pick Anthony Watmough on the strict condition that should Queenslanders pelt the Blues bus with XXXX cans, he doesn't retaliate by trying to drink every one of them.
And, sure, just like launching fireworks from your hand there will be risks with this quartet.
But find me four blokes you'd rather use if your life depended not on how many stitches were ripped or testicles tweaked, but simply the result.
And how bad is a bloke like Ennis anyway?
See, what everyone remembers from last year's final Origin game is him gifting Queensland a penalty - and eventually the match - after trading with prop Nate Myles.
What they forget, however, is Myles admitting the penalty could've been reversed. Or Wayne Bennett approaching the rake afterwards to praise his efforts.
Indeed, when prodded Ennis will tell you that penalty has become something of a key moment in his career. A turning point.
"Which sounds odd coming after the Hindmarsh incident," he shrugs. "But I wasn't throwing punches. Didn't retaliate.
"Anyway, that whole thing was little more than two old-school blokes competing. Walking off afterwards, I didn't think anything would come of it ... "
Give me a break. Didn't they watch last year's series. He was pathetic and a coward. Im so sick of these people sticking up for the grub. If they pick this loser again NSW will lose another series.
Loves the sentiment, he says. The wit. Proud that a punter and his paintbrush would beat every Sydney league hack to scribbling that phrase Ennis The Menace.
"He was a Dragons fan too," the Bulldogs hooker recalls, smiling. "Approached me after a game two years back and handed the banner over. Said maybe I'd like it as a souvenir, hang it up at home.
"And why not … I mean, you've gotta have a laugh, don't you?"
Sadly Mick, it seems the answer is "no".
No, we can't laugh at your menacing ways. At your sledging. How dare you ask an ornament of the game like Nathan Hindmarsh if he wants to throw 'em?
It's why since that altercation with the Eels skipper a fortnight ago, you've been headhunted by the NRL, hounded by naysayers and had Sterlo suggest your missus should feel peeved.
Even Rabbitohs great Johnny Sattler, a man who boasts fewer skeletons than a crematorium come knock-off time, got stuck in.
And why?
Apparently because you had the nerve to physically challenge a footballer who - according to the NRL media guide - stands 7cm taller, weighs 10kg heavier and boasts 150 more games.
You said nothing about the Hindy clan, as was whispered in the hours and days afterwards. No smartarse remarks about those Telstra commercials, either.
No, instead you simply uttered: "You've been wanting to have a crack for years Hindy ... so if you wanna throw one, throw one."
Honestly, we've heard worse from a Presbyterian pulpit. Yet still you were sin-binned. Ridiculous.
Even worse when the NRL phoned Hindy next day to determine if what you'd said was a punishable offence - even though, by its own admission, it had no idea if a ruling existed to punish you.
So, no Mick, it seems there will be no more fun in rugby league.
Not now when our game has become so sanitised. So strung out on its own importance, The Daily Telegraph can get into an Atlanta Braves dressingroom before games but not South Sydney's afterwards.
League is a game where grown men earn $300,000, bench press 180kg and collide at forces greater than a NASA shuttle launch. So how can its fabric be so seriously threatened by a fella who couldn't talk when we first called yesterday because "my wife's out so I'm babysitting our three kids"?
So overplayed has the hype surrounding Ennis become, there's even been suggestions his banter has Blues coach Ricky Stuart ready to cut him adrift.
Ricky Stuart, really? The same R. Stuart who - according to every footballer from Ah Kuoi to Zisti - is the greatest sledger league ever produced? A rambunctious Raider who on one sunny Seiffert Oval afternoon got stuck into a rival trainer for wearing prescription sunnies onto the field.
A halfback who in his prime would've made Ennis sound like a member of the Von Trapp clan singing Edelweiss.
Which isn't to say this should become another Why We Must All Love Mick yarn. Even his wife is sick of those.
Besides, if you haven't yet realised Charlie Sheen ain't the only fella who transforms when confronted by a white line, well, another round of Good Guy plugs for men like Ennis, Paul Gallen and Greg Bird won't change you.
But if NSW really wanna save themselves from getting, as Roosters coach Brian Smith might phrase it, "bent over" by Queensland this year, they should use Ennis at nine, make Gallen skipper and run Bird freely from the bench.
Even pick Anthony Watmough on the strict condition that should Queenslanders pelt the Blues bus with XXXX cans, he doesn't retaliate by trying to drink every one of them.
And, sure, just like launching fireworks from your hand there will be risks with this quartet.
But find me four blokes you'd rather use if your life depended not on how many stitches were ripped or testicles tweaked, but simply the result.
And how bad is a bloke like Ennis anyway?
See, what everyone remembers from last year's final Origin game is him gifting Queensland a penalty - and eventually the match - after trading with prop Nate Myles.
What they forget, however, is Myles admitting the penalty could've been reversed. Or Wayne Bennett approaching the rake afterwards to praise his efforts.
Indeed, when prodded Ennis will tell you that penalty has become something of a key moment in his career. A turning point.
"Which sounds odd coming after the Hindmarsh incident," he shrugs. "But I wasn't throwing punches. Didn't retaliate.
"Anyway, that whole thing was little more than two old-school blokes competing. Walking off afterwards, I didn't think anything would come of it ... "
Give me a break. Didn't they watch last year's series. He was pathetic and a coward. Im so sick of these people sticking up for the grub. If they pick this loser again NSW will lose another series.
