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New Wests Tigers prop Adam Blair is looking forwards, not backwards.
Adam Blair knows all about guilt and remorse. They are emotions he became familiar with when he was forced to sit out his final month of football with Melbourne after a moment of madness led to the infamous brawl with Glenn Stewart at Brookvale Oval last August.
But does he feel bad that his signing by the Wests Tigers meant club stalwarts Andrew Fifita and Bryce Gibbs had to be offloaded to Cronulla to free up room for him under the salary cap? Not at all.
''I'm a pretty chilled-out person and things like that don't really bother me,'' Blair said of suggestions he was the villain who had split up the happy Wests Tigers family.
''They had their reasons [to be upset] and they must've been hurting because they'd been together for a while. When something like that breaks up a group, it's obviously going to be tough, but it didn't affect me at all. And to be honest, I actually missed out on worse things than them, not playing at the end of the year.''
And that's when the 25-year-old New Zealand international talks with a sense of regret - when the conversation turns to that night at Brookvale and the sideline brawl with Stewart.
Not so much because the ensuing five-match suspension robbed him of a fairytale farewell with the Storm, but more because Blair felt he had let down the club that took him in as a 16-year-old.
''It was hard to leave,'' he said at an NRL All Stars community event in Blacktown yesterday. ''Everything just came around a bit quicker than I thought. How the season finished for me wasn't the way I wanted it to end. I made a mistake and one I really regret, which robbed me of the chance to go out on a high at the Storm. I just wanted to give them back something for all they did for me, but I didn't get that chance. That's the most disappointing for me.''
While he says the embarrassment will live with him long after he retires, Blair insists he's moved on from the incident. He knows it's a memory he can't outrun, but instead of letting it eat away at him, the former Storm powerhouse has taken a relaxed approach to the criticism.
Thankfully for Blair, it wasn't Stewart who received the most votes from Manly to gain a position in the NRL All Stars team. But Stewart's right-hand man, Anthony Watmough, joined the squad on Sunday, although no words have been exchanged with Blair just yet.
''He only came in last night and he hasn't said anything, not yet anyway,'' Blair said with a smile across his face. ''Hopefully, he's not waiting for an opportunity to get me by myself. I gave it to Kieran Foran for a couple of days on tour [at the Four Nations with the Kiwis] but we were only mucking around. I'm well over it.''
But while Blair may be comfortable sharing an off-field joke with former combatants on it, he has yet to say much to his new coach, Tim Sheens. And that is largely because the Tigers boss has not yet managed to pin his marquee man down long enough to have a decent conversation.
''I try and stay away from Sheensy because he talks too much footy,'' Blair said. ''All the boys have warned me about him talking footy, so I just quickly say hello and try and get out of there.''
Blair also revealed the motivation behind his desire to join the Tigers. While linking with Kiwi counterpart Benji Marshall was one of the main attractions, it was the Tigers' flamboyant style of football that won him over.
''To go away at the end of the year last year and to be thinking I'll be seeing Benji more often, it felt a bit funny,'' he said. ''It's good to have a quality player like Benji in your side, and I'm just trying to get used to how he does things and the style he plays.''
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Read more: http://www.smh.com.au/rugby-league/league-news/regrets-a-few-but-blair-wont-change-stripes-20120130-1qppw.html#ixzz1kyayy1DJ
Adam Blair knows all about guilt and remorse. They are emotions he became familiar with when he was forced to sit out his final month of football with Melbourne after a moment of madness led to the infamous brawl with Glenn Stewart at Brookvale Oval last August.
But does he feel bad that his signing by the Wests Tigers meant club stalwarts Andrew Fifita and Bryce Gibbs had to be offloaded to Cronulla to free up room for him under the salary cap? Not at all.
''I'm a pretty chilled-out person and things like that don't really bother me,'' Blair said of suggestions he was the villain who had split up the happy Wests Tigers family.
''They had their reasons [to be upset] and they must've been hurting because they'd been together for a while. When something like that breaks up a group, it's obviously going to be tough, but it didn't affect me at all. And to be honest, I actually missed out on worse things than them, not playing at the end of the year.''
And that's when the 25-year-old New Zealand international talks with a sense of regret - when the conversation turns to that night at Brookvale and the sideline brawl with Stewart.
Not so much because the ensuing five-match suspension robbed him of a fairytale farewell with the Storm, but more because Blair felt he had let down the club that took him in as a 16-year-old.
''It was hard to leave,'' he said at an NRL All Stars community event in Blacktown yesterday. ''Everything just came around a bit quicker than I thought. How the season finished for me wasn't the way I wanted it to end. I made a mistake and one I really regret, which robbed me of the chance to go out on a high at the Storm. I just wanted to give them back something for all they did for me, but I didn't get that chance. That's the most disappointing for me.''
While he says the embarrassment will live with him long after he retires, Blair insists he's moved on from the incident. He knows it's a memory he can't outrun, but instead of letting it eat away at him, the former Storm powerhouse has taken a relaxed approach to the criticism.
Thankfully for Blair, it wasn't Stewart who received the most votes from Manly to gain a position in the NRL All Stars team. But Stewart's right-hand man, Anthony Watmough, joined the squad on Sunday, although no words have been exchanged with Blair just yet.
''He only came in last night and he hasn't said anything, not yet anyway,'' Blair said with a smile across his face. ''Hopefully, he's not waiting for an opportunity to get me by myself. I gave it to Kieran Foran for a couple of days on tour [at the Four Nations with the Kiwis] but we were only mucking around. I'm well over it.''
But while Blair may be comfortable sharing an off-field joke with former combatants on it, he has yet to say much to his new coach, Tim Sheens. And that is largely because the Tigers boss has not yet managed to pin his marquee man down long enough to have a decent conversation.
''I try and stay away from Sheensy because he talks too much footy,'' Blair said. ''All the boys have warned me about him talking footy, so I just quickly say hello and try and get out of there.''
Blair also revealed the motivation behind his desire to join the Tigers. While linking with Kiwi counterpart Benji Marshall was one of the main attractions, it was the Tigers' flamboyant style of football that won him over.
''To go away at the end of the year last year and to be thinking I'll be seeing Benji more often, it felt a bit funny,'' he said. ''It's good to have a quality player like Benji in your side, and I'm just trying to get used to how he does things and the style he plays.''
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Read more: http://www.smh.com.au/rugby-league/league-news/regrets-a-few-but-blair-wont-change-stripes-20120130-1qppw.html#ixzz1kyayy1DJ