It’s the Premier’s fault

LukeyTuiaki

Active member
One early morning this week, hard at work on the campaign trail - out to convince the good folk of NSW that he can lead the state to a better way living, after having not had much of a chance to do so only being a member of the ruling party for the last umpteenth years… Premier Perrottet was staring out of the campaign bus window at the traffic along Parramatta Road when something caught his eye. It was a familiar, majestic sight - glistening in the sun - it was the fine mustache of the young Shawn Blore - a sight the premier had seen and enjoyed before. But alas, the mustache was different this day. Below Shawn’s fantastic facial hair did not sit his pearly whites and the young man’s trademark grin - sadly, below the mustache was long forlorn frown. And around Shawn, was more sad faces belonging to the members of the wests tiger first grade team - off to another training session to fix what they could - staring at another week looking for the seasons first win. “Stop the bus!” The premier cried, and bus driver slammed on the breaks. With the bus stopped dead on one of Sydney’s busiest roads, the premier - not for the first time inconveniencing the city’s commuters - slowly rose from his seat, ripped off his glasses and claimed “the boys need me!” Strolling into the training session, as the boys completed pass 167 of the 200 they were due to do that today - the premier did his best Ted Lasso impersonation - much to excitement of our brilliant head coach. The boys were pumped by the positive words, but we’re unsure why some primary school principal was trying to fire them up, but we’re none-the-less going to take his positive words into the big game on Friday against the Storm.
During the match, the boys packed down for a crucial scrum - and the man they thought was a primary school principal, his words rang in their ears “hold steady!” And they held, but also in that moment, forgot that they have to help the ball through the scrum by hooking to keep possession.
storm won 24-12
 
I have a transcript of what the premier said to the team, honestly, it’s beautiful. I’m surprised that his words alone weren’t enough to get the club 2 points this week
 
I remember before each game my high school league coach would recite the Thomas Keneally poem “blow that whistle, ref” the same poem used to launch the 1999 NRL season - in the sheds before we ran on to the field. Boy, did it fire us up! I’m sure the premiers words had a similar effect
 
Dp said we started slow in 05 & still won the comp
Yeah but that was 05
Not this fricking slow!

We lost to Parra in an insipid 1st round and after a 2nd round bye we then beat the 2004 Grand finalists in successive weeks!

Domicron Perrotwat is an Opus Dei cultist historical revisionist f-wit!!

Baird - Gladys and him have sold NSW public assets en masse to the big end of town and it has proven a complete failure of public policy!
 
I think some of you might be missing the satirical nature of this post… just trying to bring some levity in these dark days
 

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