Things that make you laugh!! 😂

[BZN]

What years did you go to Ashfield

I'm probably just a bit older than you innsaneink. I left there in either 1961 or 62.

 

[AmericanHistoryX]

When people say. Happy.New Year. Spiritually yes. Economically. Its a shit fight. Anyway. Happy New Year to you all.

 

[tiger_one]

Did you know that Albert Einstein was also a talented rapper?
Though you might know him better by his stage name, M.C. Squared.

 

[tiger_one]

I lost an electron.
You really have to keep an ion them!

 

[TopTiger]

A guy walks into a psychriatist's office wearing nothing but glad wrap, the psychriatist says I can clearly see your nuts.

 

[tiger_one]

Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?
Because the P is silent.

 

[TopTiger]

I spotted an albino dalmation yesterday, he seemed to appreciate it.

 

[TopTiger]

When I was a kid my dad would put me in a tyre and roll me down the hill, those were the good years.

 

[tigerballs]

Bloke dies and goes to heaven, meets St Peter at the pearly gates. St Peter says " fill out the paperwork and follow me." They walk down a corridor that's seemingly endless with walls up to the sky, covered in clocks. Bloke asks " St Peter, what's with the clocks bro?" St Peter replies "Well, there's a clock on the wall for every man on Earth and every time a man pleasures himself, his clock goes around one hour." Bloke asks " where's Tuckers clock?" St peter replies " God uses that for a fan in the office,"

 

[tiger_one]

I'm releasing a Christmas single this year called 'Lets all Feed the World and let them know its Christmas Time'. People ask me how I get away with Plagiarism.
I tell them it's as simple as ripping off a Band Aid.

 

[innsaneink]

A guy receives an ad in the mail for a golf resort where everything costs one dollar. He jumps at the offer and heads off for a weekend of fun in the sun.
He arrives and plays a round of golf. It cost him a buck. When he goes for dinner that evening, it costs him another buck. His room is only a buck a day!
The day before he's to check out, he heads out to play a last round and stops by the pro shop and charges a sleeve of three balls to his room.
When he's checking out next morning, he looks at the bill and sees:
Golf: $1.00
Dinner: $1.00
Room: $1.00.
Sleeve of golf balls: $3,000.00
He asks the Manager, "What is this all about? Everything is supposed to cost one dollar, and you charged me three thousand for three golf balls?"
"I'm sorry, sir, said the manager, but you didn't read the fine print in our promotional brochure. That's what our golf balls cost."
"Well, said the man, If I wanted to spend that kind of money, I could've gone to that luxury hotel across the street and paid them a thousand dollars a day for a room. At least I would've known what I was paying for!"
"That's right, sir, you could have, said the manager. Over there they get you by the room. Over here we get you by the balls!"

 

[Garrry]

How does a butcher introduce his wife to people? Meat Pattie

 

[tiger_one]

Lord Nelson was about 5ft 6.
His statue is 17ft 4.
That’s Horatio of about 3:1

 

[TopTiger]

Went to the zoo yesterday but it only had one animal a dog, it was a shih tzu!

 

[TopTiger]

It's a 5 minute walk from my house to the pub but a 30 minute walk from the pub home, the difference is staggering!

 

[tiger_one]

I was at the pub last night and a woman got her nipple pierced right in front of me.
On a related note, I really do suck at darts.

 

[tiger_one]

I found out my girlfriend is really a ghost.
I had my suspicions the moment she walked through the door.

 

[tiger_one]

If you spell the word “drawer” backwards, you will find your "reward."

 

[Bula]

 

[Buttface]

The 2025 Team Thread.