Top 5 Sport Star funny one liners

[GNR4LIFE]

Geez Yoss talk about an over reaction

 

[Fade_To_Black]

The one when Michael O'Connor was playing in a match in the late 80's and he suffered a massive split in his chin.
He turned to his teammates with this huge, gaping wound and asks them "how bad is it?"….to which one of them replies "mate, you could f*#@ it!"

 

[smoking_gun]

Lennox Lewis after his fight with David Tua
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"it's gonna take more then a left hook and a bad hair cut to beat lennox Lewis"

For some reason that always made me laugh

 

[crusader]

He wasn't a sportsman but he was a club legend. I don't know if it's a true story or not, Laurie Nicholls throwing a cat out the train because the owner wouldn't give him the seat & he said ratta tat tat there goes your cat…
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_Posted using RoarFEED 2012_

Ratta tat tat, say goodbye to your cat
( cat goes flying out the doors of a moving old red rattler)
True story that. I had the pleasure of hearing that story from Laurie's own mouth. God rest his soul
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_Posted using RoarFEED 2012_

Just lost a lot of respect for Nicholls if that's actually true. I have no time for people who are cruel to animals. The guy was always a sandwich short of a picnic.

Well it didn't happen so you can sleep easier tonight. Who brings a cat on a train anyway? There's no need to insult a man who is held in high esteem by a lot of people.

I heard Wayne Pearce tell this story on fox once. The cat wasn't hurt because the train wasn't going that fast. It was those old trains where the doors don't close. It was a hot day during preseason training and the lady wouldn't move the cat to give him a seat. Laurie was famous for his rhyming one liners. He tossed the cat but you don't need to get your knickers in a knot and carry on about animal cruelty . Your logic that it couldn't have happened because in your opinion , nobody would take a cat on a train is kind of cute. That must mean that laurie and Pearce are liars according to you.
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_Posted using RoarFEED 2012_

 

[Marshall_magic]

Even if the cat was fine it is still a classless thing to do

 

[crusader]

From all reports, the cat did land on its feet…...... Just saying
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_Posted using RoarFEED 2012_

 

[claws]

1) SBW deserts to France, Folkes enters the press conference with Bonjour! The first time I'd seen Steve Folkes have a good laugh.

2) Ellery Hanley on TFS in the 1980's . Fatty asks: What has been the highlight of your great career? EH replies: The women.

3) Fatty interviewing the oldest living Kangaroo( he was 97) on TFS. Fatty was being smart asking him about the drinking, smoking, gambling and bad women he met on tour, to which the old bloke cheekily responded, "I've never met a bad woman, I've only ever met good women.

 

[GoldXR50Leroy]

It's not exactly a one liner but was watching the Wigan V Leeds game on the weekend and after taking the ball up old Stevo says Pat Richards is hurt, he's down on one knee to which Eddie Hemmings without missing a beat 'he's tying up his laces',very droll Eddie and how bad is T-R-Y Stevo as a commentator.

 

[Yossarian]

Well it didn't happen so you can sleep easier tonight. Who brings a cat on a train anyway? There's no need to insult a man who is held in high esteem by a lot of people.

I heard Wayne Pearce tell this story on fox once. The cat wasn't hurt because the train wasn't going that fast. It was those old trains where the doors don't close. It was a hot day during preseason training and the lady wouldn't move the cat to give him a seat. Laurie was famous for his rhyming one liners. He tossed the cat but you don't need to get your knickers in a knot and carry on about animal cruelty . Your logic that it couldn't have happened because in your opinion , nobody would take a cat on a train is kind of cute. That must mean that laurie and Pearce are liars according to you.

_Posted using RoarFEED 2012_

How about dropping the attitude and don't put words in my mouth?

So a couple of people repeat an anecdote and you believe it as gospel? It is what's known as an apocryphal story. I'm not denying they didn't tell the story but it doesn't make it true.

 

[tigermaniac]

Guys if you have any more, keep them coming, good for a read and a laugh.
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_Posted using RoarFEED 2012_

 

[innsaneink]

Well it didn't happen so you can sleep easier tonight. Who brings a cat on a train anyway? There's no need to insult a man who is held in high esteem by a lot of people.

I heard Wayne Pearce tell this story on fox once. The cat wasn't hurt because the train wasn't going that fast. It was those old trains where the doors don't close. It was a hot day during preseason training and the lady wouldn't move the cat to give him a seat. Laurie was famous for his rhyming one liners. He tossed the cat but you don't need to get your knickers in a knot and carry on about animal cruelty . Your logic that it couldn't have happened because in your opinion , nobody would take a cat on a train is kind of cute. That must mean that laurie and Pearce are liars according to you.

_Posted using RoarFEED 2012_

How about dropping the attitude and don't put words in my mouth?

So a couple of people repeat an anecdote and you believe it as gospel? It is what's known as an apocryphal story. I'm not denying they didn't tell the story **but it doesn't make it true.**

Yet you provide nothing to back up your claims.
Other people have.
Your story may be apocryphal

 

[Citizen_Tiger]

Peter Kelly at the judiciary

So you've been charged with intent having a closed fist and attacking the head of an opponent with a swinging arm

How do you plead ?? Guilty or not guilty ??

Kelly "Not guilty you honour , when I hit them with a closed fist they go down like a sack of sh&t and stay down "

"He got up"

Not funny, just a snapshot of how completely thuggish and brainless Peter Kelly was

 

[weststigers4life]

Obviously it's too late to take back the story about Laurie allegedly throwing the cat out the window of the train that i wrote in this thread but my intentions were only meant for it to be in light humour and not to cause a bung fight amongst forum members. I realise it's not PC and i don't condone animal cruelty but i also didn't believe that it actually happened and it was just a folklore story about Laurie. i found it funny but i have a warped sense of humour and find all sorts of things funny that i shouldn't laugh at, so i apologies if i have offended anyone.

 

[Irvine]

Obviously it's too late to take back the story about Laurie allegedly throwing the cat out the window of the train that i wrote in this thread but my intentions were only meant for it to be in light humour and not to cause a bung fight amongst forum members. I realise it's not PC and i don't condone animal cruelty but i also didn't believe that it actually happened and it was just a folklore story about Laurie. i found it funny but i have a warped sense of humour and find all sorts of things funny that i shouldn't laugh at, so i apologies if i have offended anyone.

That's cool mate…the reasons I am on the forum are information and a laugh..... nothing warped about it it was was funny. :laughing: It's still funny.

 

[Winnipeg]

Obviously it's too late to take back the story about Laurie allegedly throwing the cat out the window of the train that i wrote in this thread but my intentions were only meant for it to be in light humour and not to cause a bung fight amongst forum members.

good call

can anyone verify this story about Mr Nicholls

some clown: 'I made the bench for Australia!'

Nicholls: 'yeah, what are you a carpenter?'

 

[alex]

I cant remember the players involved, but a batsman had been having a hard time getting bat on ball one over, to which the bowler said "the ball is about this big, it's red, got stitches along the middle". Next ball, goes for six over the fence. The batsman says, "alright, you know what it looks like, go find it".

 

[happy_tiger]

I cant remember the players involved, but a batsman had been having a hard time getting bat on ball one over, to which the bowler said "the ball is about this big, it's red, got stitches along the middle". Next ball, goes for six over the fence. The batsman says, "alright, you know what it looks like, go find it".

Vivian Richards was the batsman I know that for sure and the bowler I thought was Angus Fraser

 

[Cultured_Bogan]

Shane Warne was trying to coax Arjuna Ranatunga out of his crease without much success, Ian Healy pipes up by suggesting Warne should put a Mars Bar on a good length.

 

[tig_prmz]

lol one of the juniors at cricket on sat:

"he's got more blocks than a pedophile on facebook"

 

[Fade_To_Black]

Garry Jack (notoriously tight with his money) was at home with Sirro when a person from the World Wildlife Fund knocks on his door asking for a donation to help save the dolphins. Sirro is standing there at the door waiting for Jack to return from presumably going to get a few spare coins….instead he strolls up to the collector with a bucket full of water and says "here, go and build the little bastards a house".