CV & us.

@Tiger_Steve said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143536) said:
My guilt is never ending and I’ll never be 100% happy again because I think I’ve let my sons down

This is my torment as well, though for different reasons. I am trying to keep us (one son) together with his long deteriorating and now accepting of treatment, paranoid delusional schizophrenic mum. It is a struggle as there was a lot of damage done and much of it may be irreparable, as he still often has trouble accepting her, even after she has been treated and medicated.

I should have removed him earlier, with it eating away at me for a year and now that recently, for their protection, we have lost his escape to the safe zone of us staying with his nana and grandad, times are again becoming tough.
 
@Tiger_Steve said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143536) said:
I’ve had more relaxed, deep and meaningful conversations with my 21 year old son in these past three weeks than last 12 months altogether . It’s great!
I went through a terrible divorce and he really took it hard. He is wonderful but not the young man he was before the divorce. My guilt is never ending and I’ll never be 100% happy again because I think I’ve let my sons down even though I wouldn’t change what happened. Time with my son is precious and I’m enjoying it immensely. There - a bright side to this isolation!

Mate, please do not look at it that way. You obviously wasn't happy with the situation you were in and that is not a good thing for your sons to see either, you don't want to show your kids that they should ever accept being unhappy.

All I am saying is yes your divorce probably had an effect on him, but staying and being unhappy probably would have had some other effect on him!

I am glad you are getting some time with him and hopefully it will be a chance to build your relationship!
 
@formerguest said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143546) said:
@Tiger_Steve said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143536) said:
My guilt is never ending and I’ll never be 100% happy again because I think I’ve let my sons down

This is my torment as well, though for different reasons. I am trying to keep us (one son) together with his long deteriorating and now accepting of treatment, paranoid delusional schizophrenic mum. It is a struggle as there was a lot of damage done and much of it may be irreparable, as he still often has trouble accepting her, even after she has been treated and medicated.

I should have removed him earlier, with it eating away at me for a year and now that recently, for their protection, we have lost his escape to the safe zone of us staying with his nana and grandad, times are again becoming tough.

Mate, that is really hard, especially being cooped up together non stop. Please don't feel guilty, we can only do our best in the situations we find ourselves in. I am sure you are doing your best and what you feel is right!
 
@formerguest said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143546) said:
@Tiger_Steve said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143536) said:
My guilt is never ending and I’ll never be 100% happy again because I think I’ve let my sons down

This is my torment as well, though for different reasons. I am trying to keep us (one son) together with his long deteriorating and now accepting of treatment, paranoid delusional schizophrenic mum. It is a struggle as there was a lot of damage done and much of it may be irreparable, as he still often has trouble accepting her, even after she has been treated and medicated.

I should have removed him earlier, with it eating away at me for a year and now that recently, for their protection, we have lost his escape to the safe zone of us staying with his nana and grandad, times are again becoming tough.

Sorry to hear mate. We all deal with stuff hey!? All I can do is wish you well and offer an ear - PM if you ever need to share
 
@cochise said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143547) said:
@Tiger_Steve said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143536) said:
I’ve had more relaxed, deep and meaningful conversations with my 21 year old son in these past three weeks than last 12 months altogether . It’s great!
I went through a terrible divorce and he really took it hard. He is wonderful but not the young man he was before the divorce. My guilt is never ending and I’ll never be 100% happy again because I think I’ve let my sons down even though I wouldn’t change what happened. Time with my son is precious and I’m enjoying it immensely. There - a bright side to this isolation!

Mate, please do not look at it that way. You obviously wasn't happy with the situation you were in and that is not a good thing for your sons to see either, you don't want to show your kids that they should ever accept being unhappy.

All I am saying is yes your divorce probably had an effect on him, but staying and being unhappy probably would have had some other effect on him!

I am glad you are getting some time with him and hopefully it will be a chance to build your relationship!

Thanks mate. I’m fine really and our relationship is good. You’re correct - I don’t regret my decision. I am remarried to the love of my life. But my kids family unit was blown apart and I am sorry for that and it’s hard. We all want the best for our kids. Really appreciate your concern. I’ll introduce you to my kids mate if we ever get back to the footy!!
 
@happy_tiger said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143523) said:
@TrueTiger said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143508) said:
@mike said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143503) said:
@TrueTiger said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143498) said:
@innsaneink said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143469) said:
Model boat and bra co's thriving?

Yes Ink they are online businesses that have recorded huge sales in a short period of time...ninemsn and news ,com I think had an article today,even knitting and euckalele lessons..

hahahahaha I would have thought bra sales have plummeted.

No Mike apparently women a buying LOUNGE bras,they are much more comfortable,so they say...

You told me you liked that bra I sent you

I did Hap,but your missus made me give it back....with the matching thong..hahaha
 
@Tiger_Steve said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143553) said:
@cochise said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143547) said:
@Tiger_Steve said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143536) said:
I’ve had more relaxed, deep and meaningful conversations with my 21 year old son in these past three weeks than last 12 months altogether . It’s great!
I went through a terrible divorce and he really took it hard. He is wonderful but not the young man he was before the divorce. My guilt is never ending and I’ll never be 100% happy again because I think I’ve let my sons down even though I wouldn’t change what happened. Time with my son is precious and I’m enjoying it immensely. There - a bright side to this isolation!

Mate, please do not look at it that way. You obviously wasn't happy with the situation you were in and that is not a good thing for your sons to see either, you don't want to show your kids that they should ever accept being unhappy.

All I am saying is yes your divorce probably had an effect on him, but staying and being unhappy probably would have had some other effect on him!

I am glad you are getting some time with him and hopefully it will be a chance to build your relationship!

Thanks mate. I’m fine really and our relationship is good. You’re correct - I don’t regret my decision. I am remarried to the love of my life. But my kids family unit was blown apart and I am sorry for that and it’s hard. We all want the best for our kids. Really appreciate your concern. I’ll introduce you to my kids mate if we ever get back to the footy!!

I would really like that! Just remember that often the decisions that are best for us are also best for the people around us.
 
@cochise said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143562) said:
@Tiger_Steve said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143553) said:
@cochise said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143547) said:
@Tiger_Steve said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143536) said:
I’ve had more relaxed, deep and meaningful conversations with my 21 year old son in these past three weeks than last 12 months altogether . It’s great!
I went through a terrible divorce and he really took it hard. He is wonderful but not the young man he was before the divorce. My guilt is never ending and I’ll never be 100% happy again because I think I’ve let my sons down even though I wouldn’t change what happened. Time with my son is precious and I’m enjoying it immensely. There - a bright side to this isolation!

Mate, please do not look at it that way. You obviously wasn't happy with the situation you were in and that is not a good thing for your sons to see either, you don't want to show your kids that they should ever accept being unhappy.

All I am saying is yes your divorce probably had an effect on him, but staying and being unhappy probably would have had some other effect on him!

I am glad you are getting some time with him and hopefully it will be a chance to build your relationship!

Thanks mate. I’m fine really and our relationship is good. You’re correct - I don’t regret my decision. I am remarried to the love of my life. But my kids family unit was blown apart and I am sorry for that and it’s hard. We all want the best for our kids. Really appreciate your concern. I’ll introduce you to my kids mate if we ever get back to the footy!!

I would really like that! Just remember that often the decisions that are best for us are also best for the people around us.

Cheers mate! Thanks
 
I feel many of us have gone through a period of our lives that haven't been pleasant,divorce,mental health and other issues that arise along the way of life..we must stay strong and reach out if things get bad or overbearing...there is help out there and most of us on here are willing to listen and help when we can,Im by no means an expert on anything but I have learnt along the way,either through tough times as well as good times..
I can assure all of you that it hasn't been easy for me in the last 12 months but as many of you good people and many of my friends have always been there to reach to..
What we must endeavour to do is keep our families safe,ourselves safe and be vigilante of the situation at hand..
I can confidently say that TOGETHER we will get through this,no matter how testing,how depressing and how tumultuous this gets we have each other ….good will prevail over bad,,God bless you all ...
 
@TrueTiger said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143567) said:
I feel many of us have gone through a period of our lives that haven't been pleasant,divorce,mental health and other issues that arise along the way of life..we must stay strong and reach out if things get bad or overbearing...there is help out there and most of us on here are willing to listen and help when we can,Im by no means an expert on anything but I have learnt along the way,either through tough times as well as good times..
I can assure all of you that it hasn't been easy for me in the last 12 months but as many of you good people and many of my friends have always been there to reach to..
What we must endeavour to do is keep our families safe,ourselves safe and be vigilante of the situation at hand..
I can confidently say that TOGETHER we will get through this,no matter how testing,how depressing and how tumultuous this gets we have each other ….good will prevail over bad,,God bless you all ...

Keep punching TT, you've had a rough trot. All the best buddy, hope things are on the up for you👍

How's the golf going by the way mate? Had a chance to get out there yet? Will be out there in the next week or two having a bash😄
 
@Fade-To-Black said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143580) said:
@TrueTiger said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143567) said:
I feel many of us have gone through a period of our lives that haven't been pleasant,divorce,mental health and other issues that arise along the way of life..we must stay strong and reach out if things get bad or overbearing...there is help out there and most of us on here are willing to listen and help when we can,Im by no means an expert on anything but I have learnt along the way,either through tough times as well as good times..
I can assure all of you that it hasn't been easy for me in the last 12 months but as many of you good people and many of my friends have always been there to reach to..
What we must endeavour to do is keep our families safe,ourselves safe and be vigilante of the situation at hand..
I can confidently say that TOGETHER we will get through this,no matter how testing,how depressing and how tumultuous this gets we have each other ….good will prevail over bad,,God bless you all ...

Keep punching TT, you've had a rough trot. All the best buddy, hope things are on the up for you?

How's the golf going by the way mate? Had a chance to get out there yet? Will be out there in the next week or two having a bash?

Im ok mate,I plan on having a hit next week..just hit a few practice balls..
 
@Tiger_Steve said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143536) said:
I’ve had more relaxed, deep and meaningful conversations with my 21 year old son in these past three weeks than last 12 months altogether . It’s great!
I went through a terrible divorce and he really took it hard. He is wonderful but not the young man he was before the divorce. My guilt is never ending and I’ll never be 100% happy again because I think I’ve let my sons down even though I wouldn’t change what happened. Time with my son is precious and I’m enjoying it immensely. There - a bright side to this isolation!

If you are feeling any guilt mate it is because you care. Plain and simple, if you didn't care there'd be no guilt. Things happen, relationships go bust, when kids are involved it tears your guts out I know. Kids appreciate when you care mate, they eventually appreciate what has gone on and understand it. They love you that you care enough to feel guilt. Hang in there bud, it will work out OK when you care enough to make it OK✌️. All the best, we are here to chat if ever you need it
 
@formerguest said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143546) said:
@Tiger_Steve said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143536) said:
My guilt is never ending and I’ll never be 100% happy again because I think I’ve let my sons down

This is my torment as well, though for different reasons. I am trying to keep us (one son) together with his long deteriorating and now accepting of treatment, paranoid delusional schizophrenic mum. It is a struggle as there was a lot of damage done and much of it may be irreparable, as he still often has trouble accepting her, even after she has been treated and medicated.

I should have removed him earlier, with it eating away at me for a year and now that recently, for their protection, we have lost his escape to the safe zone of us staying with his nana and grandad, times are again becoming tough.

I think as you get older you accept the decisions your parents made more readily

You learn that despite everything your parents love you and tried to do their best no matter what they said or did

I guess I've learnt despite the stupid things my father said over the years that he was a young father ...barely 19 and mum was wondering why the hell she was doing an English exam while 7 1/2 months pregnant

I'm not the world's best parent myself ..but my advice would be to tell your son all the good things about your ex and explain to him that the disease changed her
 
@TrueTiger said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143582) said:
@Fade-To-Black said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143580) said:
@TrueTiger said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143567) said:
I feel many of us have gone through a period of our lives that haven't been pleasant,divorce,mental health and other issues that arise along the way of life..we must stay strong and reach out if things get bad or overbearing...there is help out there and most of us on here are willing to listen and help when we can,Im by no means an expert on anything but I have learnt along the way,either through tough times as well as good times..
I can assure all of you that it hasn't been easy for me in the last 12 months but as many of you good people and many of my friends have always been there to reach to..
What we must endeavour to do is keep our families safe,ourselves safe and be vigilante of the situation at hand..
I can confidently say that TOGETHER we will get through this,no matter how testing,how depressing and how tumultuous this gets we have each other ….good will prevail over bad,,God bless you all ...

Keep punching TT, you've had a rough trot. All the best buddy, hope things are on the up for you?

How's the golf going by the way mate? Had a chance to get out there yet? Will be out there in the next week or two having a bash?

Im ok mate,I plan on having a hit next week..just hit a few practice balls..

Bewdy, I haven't even picked up a club for 5 months. Was supposed to get out there today but it fell through. Just had to make do with the beers without the swings and a walk ?
 
Divorce is a terrible thing for kids ...I can still remember the questions you were asked by the councillors ...which parent would do this for you ...which parent would do that for you .....and 45 years later I'm not sure whether the courts got it right or not
 
@happy_tiger said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143584) said:
@formerguest said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143546) said:
@Tiger_Steve said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143536) said:
My guilt is never ending and I’ll never be 100% happy again because I think I’ve let my sons down

This is my torment as well, though for different reasons. I am trying to keep us (one son) together with his long deteriorating and now accepting of treatment, paranoid delusional schizophrenic mum. It is a struggle as there was a lot of damage done and much of it may be irreparable, as he still often has trouble accepting her, even after she has been treated and medicated.

I should have removed him earlier, with it eating away at me for a year and now that recently, for their protection, we have lost his escape to the safe zone of us staying with his nana and grandad, times are again becoming tough.

I think as you get older you accept the decisions your parents made more readily

You learn that despite everything your parents love you and tried to do their best no matter what they said or did

I guess I've learnt despite the stupid things my father said over the years that he was a young father ...barely 19 and mum was wondering why the hell she was doing an English exam while 7 1/2 months pregnant

I'm not the world's best parent myself ..but my advice would be to tell your son all the good things about your ex and explain to him that the disease changed her

Maybe you misread, as she is not my ex and I am still trying to keep the family unit together as best as possible.
 
@Fade-To-Black said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143583) said:
@Tiger_Steve said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143536) said:
I’ve had more relaxed, deep and meaningful conversations with my 21 year old son in these past three weeks than last 12 months altogether . It’s great!
I went through a terrible divorce and he really took it hard. He is wonderful but not the young man he was before the divorce. My guilt is never ending and I’ll never be 100% happy again because I think I’ve let my sons down even though I wouldn’t change what happened. Time with my son is precious and I’m enjoying it immensely. There - a bright side to this isolation!

If you are feeling any guilt mate it is because you care. Plain and simple, if you didn't care there'd be no guilt. Things happen, relationships go bust, when kids are involved it tears your guts out I know. Kids appreciate when you care mate, they eventually appreciate what has gone on and understand it. They love you that you care enough to feel guilt. Hang in there bud, it will work out OK when you care enough to make it OK✌️. All the best, we are here to chat if ever you need it

Thanks F2B. Nice words. It’s all good - I’m no different to most and much better off than some. I’m blessed mate. Just hit a speed bump hard that’s all. But you know, I look at the devastation around at present and count my blessings. But really positive to read the kindness from many on this forum.
 
@formerguest said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143588) said:
@happy_tiger said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143584) said:
@formerguest said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143546) said:
@Tiger_Steve said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143536) said:
My guilt is never ending and I’ll never be 100% happy again because I think I’ve let my sons down

This is my torment as well, though for different reasons. I am trying to keep us (one son) together with his long deteriorating and now accepting of treatment, paranoid delusional schizophrenic mum. It is a struggle as there was a lot of damage done and much of it may be irreparable, as he still often has trouble accepting her, even after she has been treated and medicated.

I should have removed him earlier, with it eating away at me for a year and now that recently, for their protection, we have lost his escape to the safe zone of us staying with his nana and grandad, times are again becoming tough.

I think as you get older you accept the decisions your parents made more readily

You learn that despite everything your parents love you and tried to do their best no matter what they said or did

I guess I've learnt despite the stupid things my father said over the years that he was a young father ...barely 19 and mum was wondering why the hell she was doing an English exam while 7 1/2 months pregnant

I'm not the world's best parent myself ..but my advice would be to tell your son all the good things about your ex and explain to him that the disease changed her

Maybe you misread, as she is not my ex and I am still trying to keep the family unit together as best as possible.

My sincerest apologies ...I did misread your comment
 
@happy_tiger said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143593) said:
@formerguest said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143588) said:
@happy_tiger said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143584) said:
@formerguest said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143546) said:
@Tiger_Steve said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143536) said:
My guilt is never ending and I’ll never be 100% happy again because I think I’ve let my sons down

This is my torment as well, though for different reasons. I am trying to keep us (one son) together with his long deteriorating and now accepting of treatment, paranoid delusional schizophrenic mum. It is a struggle as there was a lot of damage done and much of it may be irreparable, as he still often has trouble accepting her, even after she has been treated and medicated.

I should have removed him earlier, with it eating away at me for a year and now that recently, for their protection, we have lost his escape to the safe zone of us staying with his nana and grandad, times are again becoming tough.

I think as you get older you accept the decisions your parents made more readily

You learn that despite everything your parents love you and tried to do their best no matter what they said or did

I guess I've learnt despite the stupid things my father said over the years that he was a young father ...barely 19 and mum was wondering why the hell she was doing an English exam while 7 1/2 months pregnant

I'm not the world's best parent myself ..but my advice would be to tell your son all the good things about your ex and explain to him that the disease changed her

Maybe you misread, as she is not my ex and I am still trying to keep the family unit together as best as possible.

My sincerest apologies ...I did misread your comment

No problem, most of your comment was pertinent anyway.
 
@Tiger_Steve said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143589) said:
@Fade-To-Black said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143583) said:
@Tiger_Steve said in [Covid 19 Taking its toll\.\.](/post/1143536) said:
I’ve had more relaxed, deep and meaningful conversations with my 21 year old son in these past three weeks than last 12 months altogether . It’s great!
I went through a terrible divorce and he really took it hard. He is wonderful but not the young man he was before the divorce. My guilt is never ending and I’ll never be 100% happy again because I think I’ve let my sons down even though I wouldn’t change what happened. Time with my son is precious and I’m enjoying it immensely. There - a bright side to this isolation!

If you are feeling any guilt mate it is because you care. Plain and simple, if you didn't care there'd be no guilt. Things happen, relationships go bust, when kids are involved it tears your guts out I know. Kids appreciate when you care mate, they eventually appreciate what has gone on and understand it. They love you that you care enough to feel guilt. Hang in there bud, it will work out OK when you care enough to make it OK✌️. All the best, we are here to chat if ever you need it

Thanks F2B. Nice words. It’s all good - I’m no different to most and much better off than some. I’m blessed mate. Just hit a speed bump hard that’s all. But you know, I look at the devastation around at present and count my blessings. But really positive to read the kindness from many on this forum.

I know the feeling Steve ..life's not perfect but their are poor buggers far worse off than I at the moment
 

Members online

Back
Top