Things that make you laugh!! 😂

It’s about that time of year we say goodbye to the wife, husband, kids and family until footy season finishes.. Bye family see you soon.
Tag a love one who goes missing during footy season..
Go........ TIGERS
 
Biologists have just created immortal frogs by removing their vocal cords.

They never croak.
 
Son: Dad Are you concerned about the players who left our club last year?
Dad: Laughs.. No son, have you seen the players we have signed?!!!
 
I know I shouldn’t have done this, but I am 83 years old and I was in the McDonald’s drive-through this morning and the young lady behind me leaned on her horn and started mouthing something because I was taking too long to place my order. So when I got to the first window I paid for her order along with my own. The cashier must have told her what I'd done, because as we moved up she leaned out her window and waved to me and mouthed "Thank you.", obviously embarrassed that I had repaid her rudeness with kindness. When I got to the second window I showed them both receipts and took her food too. Now she has to go back to the end of the queue and start all over again,
Don't blow your horn at old people, they have been around a long time.🤣😂🙋‍♀️🙋‍♂️🍔🍟☕️
 
A know it all quiz champion puts out a challenge.

He says that he will challenge any takers with a question and if they get it right he will pay them $500 and if they get it wrong they have to pay him only $5.

The challenger can then ask a question and if the quiz champ can answer it he $5, but if he gets it wrong he will pay the challenger $500 and so on and so forth.

Very enticing odds, and a challenger steps up to take him on.

The quiz champ asks the first question which is, "what is the distance from the Earth to Jupiter?"

The challenger gives in and hands over $5.

It is now the challengers turn to ask a question and he asks, "What animal goes up a hill with 3 legs and goes back down the other side with 4 legs?"

Well the champ is stumped and after thinking about it for a very long time, gives in and hands over $500.

The champ then asks the challenger, "Well, what animal is that goes up a hill with 3 legs and goes back down the other side with 4 legs?"

The challenger says, "I wouldn't have a clue" and hands over another $5.
 
@elderslie_tiger said in [Dad Humour](/post/1312917) said:
I know I shouldn’t have done this, but I am 83 years old and I was in the McDonald’s drive-through this morning and the young lady behind me leaned on her horn and started mouthing something because I was taking too long to place my order. So when I got to the first window I paid for her order along with my own. The cashier must have told her what I'd done, because as we moved up she leaned out her window and waved to me and mouthed "Thank you.", obviously embarrassed that I had repaid her rudeness with kindness. When I got to the second window I showed them both receipts and took her food too. Now she has to go back to the end of the queue and start all over again,
Don't blow your horn at old people, they have been around a long time.🤣😂🙋‍♀️🙋‍♂️🍔🍟☕️

:rolling_on_the_floor_laughing: :joy: :raising_hand: :man-raising-hand: :hamburger: :fries:
 
@cairnstigers said in [Dad Humour](/post/1313256) said:
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows on to high

She looked surprised

:clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap::clap: :clap: :clap:
 
I got fired from my job because I kept asking my customers if they would prefer Smoking or Non Smoking

Apparently the terms are Cremation or Burial
 

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