Things that make you laugh!! 😂

[Cultured_Bogan]

A bloke opens up his fridge to grab a beer to find a rabbit asleep inside. While the rabbit is stirring awake the bloke asks him, "what are you doing inside my fridge?!"

The rabbit says "this is a Westinghouse, isn't it?"

"Yes it is, why does that matter?" Replies the man.

"Well, I'm westing..."

 

[happy_tiger]

Why can't Donald Trump, who is a convicted Rapist and Felon stay at the White House ??

Because it is forbiden

 

[jadtiger]

Why can't Donald Trump, who is a convicted Rapist and Felon stay at the White House ??

Because it is forbiden

Careful you will upset Col spreading fake news like that

 

[tiger_one]

Christmas marketing:

We brought gold and frankincense for you, Jesus.
But wait:
There's myrhh.

 

[hank37w]

My wife had a credit card stolen but I didn't bother cancelling it because the thief was spending less than my wife.

 

[happy_tiger]

Christmas marketing:

We brought gold and frankincense for you, Jesus.
But wait:
There's myrhh.

Myrrh ...hasn't that got great big claws ......

 

[tiger_one]

My wife asked if I'd seen the dog bowl.
To be honest, I didn't know he played.

 

[mike]


 

[mike]

Things are very polite at the White House lately. A lot of ‘Pardon Me’ going around

 

[happy_tiger]

An English cricketer , West Indian cricketer , New Zealander cricketer and Indian cricketer walk into a bar .....3 walk out English cricketers ..the other walks out 12th man

 

[hank37w]

A guy walks up to the counter at the chemist and says, "Have you got anything for diarrhoea?"
Chemist says, "Sure, try these tablets"
Customer says, " I was thinking more like a mop and bucket, I've just shat on your floor"

 

[hank37w]

While we are dabbling in that area:

Have you heard about the new Movie called "Constipation"?
It's not out yet.....

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?
To get to the bottom!

 

[Cairnstigers]

While we are dabbling in that area:

Have you heard about the new Movie called "Constipation"?
It's not out yet.....

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?
To get to the bottom!

How do you recycle toilet paper
Hang it on the wall and punch the crap out of it

 

[hank37w]

Okay then:
What do you get if you cross a bear with a toilet?

Winnie the Pooh.

 

[Eca]

True story, playing golf with a younger buddy, his last round as a single. I asked him where they off to for their honeymoon.. he said Tassie
Thought i'd throw on oldie.. bud just remember honeymoon should only be 6 days not 7 ok?
To my surprise he asked why.. i said coz 7 days makes the hole weak.. he goes what? I don't understand.. couldn't play his next shot after i explained.

 

[hank37w]

Now that you have brought up the subject of golf:

Why did the golfer wear twp pairs of pants?

In case he got a hole in one.

 

[mike]

Last night my local Woolworths burnt down. Now it’s just Coles.

 

[Cultured_Bogan]

My wife had asked me if I had seen the dog bowl. I told her I didn't even know he could play cricket.

 

[hank37w]

Two men were arrested, one for drinking battery acid and the other for eating fireworks.

Police charged one and let the other off.

 

[hank37w]

Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was out standing in his field.