Things that make you laugh!! 😂

[JD Tiger]

I got fired from my job because I kept asking my customers if they would prefer Smoking or Non Smoking

Apparently the terms are Cremation or Burial

That one is Really funny. I'm going to go tell the missus.

 

[mike]

What is a kangaroo’s favourite drink?
Beer 🍺 because they like the hops.

 

[mike]

What do you call a parrot that flew away?....

A polygon!

 

[mike]

What begins with an E, but only contains one letter??

Envelope!

 

[mike]

What attracts knights in shining armour more than damsels in distress?

Magnets 🧲

 

[Tiger_Fanatic3]

My wife just left me. She says life revolves around football and she's sick of it.
I'm quite upset. We were together for 7 seasons..

 

[Tiger_Fanatic3]

I went to a bookstore and saw a book titled "How to solve 50% of your problems"..
I bought 2

 

[Tiger_Fanatic3]

I always take my problems to Tommy..
"Hilfiger something out"

 

[tiger_one]

What kind of doctor is Dr Pepper?
A Fizzician.

 

[Tiger_Fanatic3]

What do you call a magician who loses his magic?
"Ian".

 

[Tiger_Fanatic3]

Since fb claims ownership of everything you post on their website..
I think I should start uploading my bills.

 

[mike]

Why did the cross eyed teacher get fired?

Because they couldn’t control their pupils.

 

[TrueTiger]

Why did the cross eyed teacher get fired?

Because they couldn’t control their pupils.

I went into the bank the other day and an elderly lady asked me to check her balance...so I pushed her over...

 

[TrueTiger]

The other day my missus asked me to pass her lipstick,but I accidentlly passed her the glue ...she still isnt talking to me.....

 

[TrueTiger]

I bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer,I dont know what he laced them with but Ive been tripping all day....

 

[mike]

How do vampires like their coffee?
Decoffinated.

 

[mike]

It's a five minute walk from my house to the pub.
It's a 35 minute walk from the pub to my house.
The difference is staggering.

 

[BWGleague]

some mexican bloke pushed his wife off a cliff
he tried tequila

 

[Tiger_Fanatic3]

A priest, a pastor, and a rabbit entered a clinic to donate blood.

The nurse asked the rabbit: "What's your blood type?"

"I'm probably a Type O", said the rabbit.

 

[happy_tiger]

Hobbo was recently invited to a Post Office party

He asked what a Post Office party was....

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